Difficulties from the get-go
Reader left outside the story
The story was told in a manner of a narrator, or as if I were sitting with you and relaying facts of an event.
When you immediately encounter spelling errors in the Introduction, there isn't much hope that the author did a thorough job editing the book: reducing one "eating time", instead of reducing one's "eating time", and why did "eating time" need to be in quotes?
...get a new cover, because this one is not great.
Everyone's an author nowadays...
...but many shouldn't be.
Started losing me in Chapter One
Why? Because of the infantile dialogue and writing style plus a forced plot.
Too Many Negative Points...
...to push this to a 3 star book. Let's start with the characters.
This is the sappy, love-at-first sight romance novel on steroids. Everything over-the-top.
Don't know what this is
First, get the cover re-done, it's as ridiculous as the story.
A teen loses his mom, becomes disillusioned with his father and finds solace (of a sort) in a Ancient-Egyptian lore-spouting older waitress.
Couldn't Get The Point
From the beginning, I tried to get the point of the book, but it was very difficult.
I Couldn't Quite Get Into It
First of all, the writing was either well done, or it wasn't, which made me have to re-read some parts for it to make sense. For example:
"A week later, I was caught behind a school bus flipping briskly through my notepad."
Really? A school bus is flipping through your notepad?
Too Little Substance and...
...too many mistakes. Geez, but this really had the potential to be a cute short fantasy read, but it has far too many issues as it stands now.
First of all...
...please get a professional cover made. I nearly by-passed this because the cover is really bad.
I Didn't Get The Purpose
First of all, the cover needs re-working.
I Wasn't Certain...
...how to put everything down succinctly about this book because there are just way too many issues that need addressing before this can be a book worth reading. Where to start?
Easily 4 Stars with a Few Adjustments
The synopsis is difficult to flesh out.
Too Many Perfect Protagonists. No Antagonists.
First, that had to be the shortest prologue in history (that I've ever read) and seemed absolutely pointless.