Not A Bad Read With Potential
There were times when I was enjoying the book, and other times I would shake my head because it was either dragging, boring, or cliche.
So, somewhere in the middle the story had potential but I just couldn't find myself getting invested in the characters. I should have been rooting for Michael and Jessie and the twins, but they were just characters on a page. No depth to feel anything for.
Then there were the moments of contradiction when it appeared the author wasn't certain how to wrap something up or casually maneuver a different direction, so would do an abrupt about face, for example:
Michael is telling Jessie that she can keep the money, that he doesn't want anything to do with it, while Jessie is attempting to convince him that she hasn't touched it and doesn't want it. This goes on for several pages (I don't want it, use it for the twins. I want nothing to do with it., etc.), then suddenly does a reversal saying that her not using the account is a good thing because it could be traced back to her.
The ending definitely sets up for the next book. I'd say it was well done, but it was so cliche and over-the-top that I just sighed.
There were also a lot of mechanical errors. A lot.
Misspelled words (i.e. ease droppers & Hand the key back over to Jessie..[should be 'Handed'.).
Strange spelling and/or sentence structure (i.e. Therefor a minute, I thought...); misplaced/misused punctuation (Taking all, he could make of the overheard conversation...). Those are just examples. This book is littered with mechanical errors.
If a writer is going to take the time to write a series and self publish, they should take the time to edit their work better. I don't expect a writer to be perfect. A mistake here and there is not uncommon, nor does it mess with the flow of the book most times. I've read stories that are so engrossing that a mistake doesn't even hamper the enjoyment of the read. When there are this many, however, it throws everything off. Fix your mistakes, work on your dialogue, close your plot holes, and your book will definitely be worth reading.
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